A Girl Can Dream.

I have this problem. 

Okay, well, let's focus on just one of them. 

I'm a dreamer. 

And no, not the "follow-your-heart-you-can-make-dreams-reality" type of dreamer. 

I mean, for example, today I dreamed about teaching french to a bunch of ten year-old children in Paris. In my head, I miraculously came home from a perfect day at school with little french girls in their dainty dresses, while singing french songs and having a very french-y (?) rendezvous with them. My apartment was filled with colors and happy flowers. It looked something like this: 

Not to mention, I was greeted by a very hot (that's a technical term) french man in the doorway. 

I, then, sat at a cafe that (naturally) was right below my amazingly cheap priced European flat, while correcting papers and eating a croissant. Let's not forget that I was wearing this: 

Because, ya know, I live in Paris, so I have wear the most splendid, fashionable clothes. 

Oh, to be a teacher in Paris. 

Forgive me, let me correct myself.

Oh, to be a teacher in Paris in my mind. 

ANYWHO. 

My point is, that, my dreams are very unrealistic. At least, for the current financial and emotional stage of life that I am currently in. 

There are so many things that I want to do, to experience, and go through. 

So, I want to fill you in on this list...

1. To prove my point that was stated above and 2. To prove it again.

Teach and/or live in Europe. (shocking)

Teach and/or live in a big city.  (Preferably in Boston in New York or at a poor school where   a blonde, white Mormon, girl (that's me) would be the minority. Think Freedom Writers) 

Go back to Africa every summer and do humanitarian work. (My heart aches thinking of Kenya)

Live in a white house with a porch and a willow tree that has a lake in it's backyard. (This includes a few acres with horses as well. Oh, and a gazebo. Think Forrest Gump) 

Skydive. (Psh, yea.) 

Be on Broadway. (Hey, this could happen while I'm teaching in New York. Should we just move on?)

Learn sign language. Maybe Spanish. Maybe French. 

Move to that Big City (see #2) and become a famous actress or singer. (Ya know, either one)
Be a hippie. Live on an Indian Reservation. (those don't correlate, I know)
Write a novel. 

Run a half marathon.
Visit every state in the United States (this includes every LDS temple).

Learn how to sail. 

Attend at least one major sporting event: NBA championship, the Olympics, etc.

See the North Stars. 

Have a beach house. 

Learn how to draw. Learn how to cook. Learn how to be domestic. (HA)

Go on a hot air balloon. (yes, I have never done this)

Teach someone to read- DID  IT. DONE. Africa. Boom. Check. 

Get married in the Portland LDS temple. (maybe this isn't a realistic one? I am, after all, 21 and not married in Provo)

Relearn how to play the piano.

Get skinny. (meh)


I'm not entirely sure if some of those are just my natural dreaming self or not...
Yikes. I just disproved my point. 
I am not a very good arguer. Well, at least we learned that today.
Okay, so, most of my dreams are just idealistic. Is that a better word?

Today, we had a mountain man who lives in a cabin in Canada and hunts animals come and visit. I wanted TO DO THIS.  Let me repeat that: I wanted to this, people. What is going on? I thought is sounded exhilarating, adventurous, and different. So I guess we can add that to our list?

I think I'm going crazy. I have all of these eccentric things I want to do. I recently have had these random bursts of energy. I will cook, clean, workout, be productive. And then I will crash; literally then have zero energy the next day. I feel like something is wrong... I think it's my coping mechanisms. Quite honestly, one day, it is literally impossible to get out of bed. The next day, my amount of energy is out of control. This up and down cycle is happening because I think I'm just trying to deal with everything. It's been a hard month. A really really hard month. I think the dreaming is occurring because it's a coping mechanism as well. I dream of Holland, Ryan and Meme a lot. I think I am subconsciously feeling the pain for my sister and brother in law. Does that sound too freaky? 

And because I have to bring 72.6% of the things I do back to brain typing:

INFPs tendency to be idealistic and romantically-minded may cause them to fantasize frequently about a "more perfect" situation. They are constantly looking for "something more."

Ere a go, the list above. Yep. See what I mean? I better marry rich. 

P.S. When writing a parentheses with comments after a sentence (the parts of this blog that have the cynical, dry sense of humor) does the period go before or after? Can I just ignore the period? I'm a grammar nerd, but I can never remember this one. Ever. Bri, I'm sure you'll answer this.